February 17, 2004

This past week was not one that I would want to keep in my memory bank.  I am not sure why I feel so discouraged and unmotivated. Could it possibly be because of the pathetic medical care I am receiving combined with the blood pressure problems? Could the fact that I will have to wait forever to see the hypertension specialist be a contributing factor? Is the bone pain getting worse or is the medication no longer working? The pain issue is beginning to frighten me.  Usually I am able to push these negative feelings aside and find something interesting to occupy my mind.  I was unable to do that this week.

I called the office of the hypertension specialist last week to find out if I could expect an appointment any time soon. The secretary told me that they were booking appointments for patients that had been referred LAST year so I would have to wait for a while.  Needless to say, this information did not improve my state of mind.

The appointment with the neurologist has been scheduled for March 18th. I am counting on this being a successful appointment. This doctor has been my neurologist for many years and he has always had my best interest in mind.

The support forum membership is growing and there has been an increase in messages every day. I attribute this to the wonderful group of moderators on the forum. The participants in the Thursday and Saturday evening chats are a great group of women who support and encourage each other. Last week, a Tuesday morning chat was added for those people who find it difficult to attend the evening chats.

When you see the discord on some boards, I realize how fortunate I am that my support forum and chats are frequented by kind, caring, non-abusive people. I want to take this opportunity to thank you all from the bottom of my heart. One of the troublemaking drama queens invaded my space this week with the intent to cause trouble and to cause friction. Why this drama queen found it necessary to invade my space I will never know.  She has absolutely no interest in me personally and absolutely no interest in my website.  She posted numerous messages on two boards; one that is being maliciously attacked and the other with members that are instigating the attacks. These silly messages portrayed her perception of the 30 second interaction we had the evening she invaded my space. This drama queen did not have the wherewithal to understand that it is the members of the new “not so upstanding” board that are not welcome in my space.  Of course, this invasion bothered me, especially after I was made aware of all the negative and derisive comments being made about me on the “not so upstanding” board. Then I came to my senses and realized that there will always be unfulfilled drama queens in cyber space whose only goal in life is to try and cause problems for other people. Of course the drama queens I speak of come in both the male and female variety. I had hoped that my name would never appear on the “not so upstanding” board, but alas my wishes were in vain.  I have never invaded the space of the “not so upstanding” board and never will. I just cannot understand why the drama queens from the “not so upstanding” board feel the need to invade my space? Could it be that their “not so upstanding” board is boring and that the drama queens have an uncontrollable urge to find weird “excitement” elsewhere?  I was under the impression that someone suffering from an autoimmune disease should avoid stress. It is so pitiful that these drama queens, who apparently are all suffering from an autoimmune disease, find the need to put stress on others who are also suffering. Thankfully, in the words of my mother, “This too shall pass.”

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