May 20, 2018

Days like today are miserable.  I woke up with horrendous fatigue and an overall feeling of doom and gloom.  What causes pain to be so much worse on some days when medication does not help at all?  I slept till 3:00 PM this afternoon and felt very guilty for wasting a day.  Sometimes the guilt is almost as bad as the pain.  I feel guilty that I left the kitchen a mess overnight.  I feel guilty that the house is untidy.  Most of all I feel guilty that my husband has to put up with these pathetic times when all I do is sleep.  When I think about the future I feel both sad and angry that this is what my life will be like until the end.  No peace and no joy.

Yesterday afternoon I watched the Royal Wedding.  Britbox carried the event all day so I did not have to get up at 4:30 AM to watch.  By the way, Britbox is a great service featuring British TV programs and movies at a very reasonable monthly price.  Another service featuring British TV programs, movies as well as Swedish, Australian, Danish programs. is called Acorn.  Check them out online.  Today I found that CBS is streaming its’s programs.   At this rate, there is no need for cable TV.

Since I have nothing interesting to post I will continue my writing on another day.  I hope you all are having a better Sunday than I am.

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1 Response to May 20, 2018

  1. Jan Judge says:

    Oh Luella what a shame. I understand exactly what you mean. I used to feel sooo guility on those days too and esp. that Rob had to come home to a mess and cook dinner. Hopefully those days will pass and you will feel better. Let me know if we are having chat tonight.


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